5 questions most feared by men

Got this in my mail box few days ago. Thx Hadie. Hmm.. got woman asked man these questions meh? erm.. in our defense, it's always the HORMON, HORMON and HORMON. Man, stop blaming woman. We are delicate creatures, u know... :P ok, i leave it all to u. U decide. Oh and if you have any killer question from woman, do care to post it in the comments. :)

Tried to google "5 questions most feared by men". It returns 1,480 sites. Googled "5 questions most feared by women" satu habuk pun tarak. hampeh betullaaa.. maybe if i got time, i'll come up with the list of questions feared by women.. so korang tunggu jer lah.

And whenever you see something like 'copy and paste' here, it means that i run out of ideas what to blog. I have but then it will take long hours for me to write whatever it is in my mind. Besides, i don't want to dissapoint my readers here, right? i know the feelings whenever you go to somebody's blog, and nothing. no updates. Ok.. honestly, the people under my 'Reading' list, i check you out everyday. Now you know. ;) am i addicted? yes, i am. am i lonely? nope, just busy. Have you nothing better to do? Yes I do. Always rely on multitasking.

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The 5 questions most feared by men are:

1. What are you thinking about?
2. Do you love me?
3. Do I look fat?
4. Do you think she is prettier than me?
5. What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly ( i.e.,tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible Responses.

Question # 1: What are you thinking about?

The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."

This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following:

a. Baseball.
b. Football.
c. How fat you are.
d. How much prettier she is than you.
e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy,who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!"

Question # 2: Do you love me?

The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear." Inappropriate responses include:

a. Oh Yeah, shit loads.
b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
c. That depends on what you mean by love.
d. Does it matter?
e. Who, me?

Question # 3: Do I look fat?

The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Among the incorrect answers are:

a. Compared to what?
b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
c. A little extra weight looks good on you.
d. I've seen fatter.
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me?

Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!" Incorrect responses include:

a. Yes, but you have a better personality
b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner
c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age
d. Define pretty
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question # 5: What would you do if I died?

A definite no-win question. (The real answer, of course, is "Buy a Corvette and an airplane") No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along the these lines:

WOMAN: Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not? Don't you like being married?
MAN: Of course I do.
WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)
WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
MAN: Where else would we sleep?
WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with
pictures of her?
MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
WOMAN: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
MAN: She can't use them; she's left-handed
WOMAN: - - - silence - - -
MAN: Oh shit.